My Resume for being a decent human being.

My Decent Human Being resume:

  • I move earth worms from concrete to grass.
  • Stray grocery carts in the parking lot get placed in their proper spots when I’m around…I also feel obligated to bring the CVS cart back inside – There’s no where to put it! I want to write them a letter about it, but I don’t – So that makes me feel decent too.
  • I give the buttered parts of the toast to my dog – Even the LAST bite.
  • I concern myself with the feelings of others…to a fault – I actually practice trying to NOT worry about what other people think…it’s downright tough.
  • My goal in life is to be the best version of me…whoever that may be. I enjoy exploring my options:)
  • It bothers me that paved roads have separated trees and created roadkill.
  • Some mornings…the beauty of the sunrise actually brings me to tears.
  • I openly admit to having double standards.
  • I don’t enjoy compliments.
  • I pray for squirrels.
  • A butterfly’s near miss at death by windshield fills my soul with relief.
  • I apologize to my children.
  • I pray for celebrities. For real – I prayed for Brit through the rough patch.

Seriously, I feel like I should be lying on a couch, discussing these things with a paid professional. You readers will have to suffice.

  • I lie awake at night worrying that I’m scarring my children…praying to be a better mother.
  • I give my stuff away – Like, for real…a cashier complimented my shoes the other day and I asked her if she wanted them. I’m pretty sure she took offense, but I can’t control that.
  • I find it amusing when people are rude to me for no reason. It literally makes my day sometimes.
  • I love proving myself wrong and doing something just plain stupid…“You thought you were so smart, eh???” lol
  • If I have to go back home for something…or get turned around in traffic – I always assume that my life has just been saved. No such thing as a coincidence in traffic, y’all.
  • I really like imperfections.
  • Sometimes metaphors feel like reality to me.
  • I can’t stand politics.

 

:))))))) Hopefully I get the position as a decent human being! lol

XOXO, Beck

 

I brake for birds.

The neighborhood threeway stop

Had my foot on the brake.

No cars in any direction…

Just a bird…

Walking across the street.

I watched the little winged creature

Take his morning stroll,

And all I could do was wonder, why?

I was stopped longer than necessary,

Stupefied.

***

Why aren’t you flying high, little one?

Why have you grounded those gorgeous

Wings of yours?

Do you need a minute to think?

Are you sick of sharing the sky?

Do you need a new perspective?

Are you tired?

***

Sometimes we all need a break from our natures.

If only to remember that we need to return to ourselves…

To effortless living…

To what feels right.

***

So walk a bit little birdie…

But don’t take too long to get back

Where you belong.

Flying high – Dipping and diving…

Your spirit’s smile,

Greeting each new day’s morning.

***

-Becky Moore

Days like today…

On days like today…I just have to tell myself that I’m the version of me that my best friend sees…

I’m the Becky that Rae Rae thinks I am…

***

I’m strong and kind.

A great mom…

That good kind of crazy.

My kids…

They’re lucky to be adored

By a woman like me.

A day spent by my side could carry

You through 364 without.

My heart…

It’s bigger than the distance

Between both of ours.

I am good…

I am enough…

I am loved.

***

I don’t know about y’all…but sometimes – I just just need to see myself through my best friend’s eyes…

XOXO, Beck

I’m about to show you how dumb I am.

Ok.

So I’m gonna just go ahead and type this all out without doing any research – With no clue as to what I’m actually talking about. I think I’ll end up with a point to it all…Just stay with me. And to all of you seriously smart people in my life – I mean, *cough Melissa *cough, you know who you are;) This is me telling you how much I didn’t learn in school…But I can doodle you a masterpiece – Believe that.

On with it, Becky…

So I’ve been bouncing a quite basic concept around in my mind for a bit. It started when I decided that I have too much stuff…and that I can lower my stress level by minimizing said stuff. And because my brain really never shuts up, I started thinking about stuff in general…

A thought that boggled my mind just came to me in bold print,

THERE IS NOTHING NEW.

Say what?!?

I was sitting on my couch, with a cup of coffee, of course…staring out my back windows and just trying to decide if this bold thought was true or not.

I asked myself,

Does matter multiply?”

Or are we working with the same stuff…over and over again? See – If I had a mind for science, I’d maybe know there was a theory, or three, that proved me wrong or right. I watch quite a bit of The Big Bang Theory – But I’m pretty sure it has nothing to do with String Theory or Dark Matter – So, I’m pretty much at a loss.

Then I started thinking about all of the stuff I have in my house…

***

I’m just arranging

And rearranging…

It’s all the same stuff.

Nothing new…

Just arranged differently…

It’s so disturbing to me

That the order of my things

Effects my mood

So severely. 

***

I have this need for more stuff…

It bothers me that I’m not above such obvious materialism. Yet, I can’t attribute the need to keep all of my stuff to one thing – Near ’bout everything I own has sentimental value. It feels wrong to let go of a memory.

I’m a sentimental hoarder.

A couple of months ago my dog accidentally broke my late Grandma’s lamp. I didn’t know Mary Donyce LePoint Rains – So the lamp felt like one of my ties to her. I bawled like a baby when the lamp broke. As I cleaned up the mess, I chanted to myself,

“It’s just a thing. You can’t take it with you.”

Over and over I said that to myself until the floor was all cleaned up. After that, I wanted to get rid of everything…’cause I’ve tied myself so deeply to the things that hold memories – So much so, that I literally cried over the loss of it.  I can’t live through great loss twice – Once with the actual person and secondly with the things that I tie to them.

I wonder if someone else has cried over that lamp…

If it’s sentimental value has been recycled over the years…

Reincarnated sentiment.

This is the stuff that I think about.

***

The thing is, it really is just all stuff. It’s all the same stuff that’s always been around – Just remade. At least, that’s how I see it.

My basic revelation is that

***

Nothing is new…

Nothing is mine…

Nothing can be lost…

It’s all just the same kind of different,

Over and over again.

***

I don’t want to spend my life worrying about the things that I have or don’t have…

I don’t want to spend my life arranging and rearranging stuff…

I don’t want to be sad that some material thing is gone.

***

Does matter multiply?

The things that matter do…

Love can grow…

It can change a heart…

It can give you hope…

It can satisfy a longing – A need – A dream.

Unseen matter multiplies…

It abounds..

It confounds.

***

I just wanted to share this with y’all – I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately…This is me – Just trying to grow – Trying to be better:)

AND…

This pseudo-science lesson has been brought to you by Becky M.

Now you see why I can’t homeschool my children.

XOXO, Beck

No such thing as a closet Bieber fan. Nope.

***

Why are you pretending to be someone you’re not?

Go ahead and sing along…

Justin Bieber is a lyrical genius.

You think you’re too good

To know the words to his journal entries

By heart?

***

Stop trying to pretend you don’t listen

to the same music I do.

It’s just downright ridiculous and embarrassing.

***

Sing along, sister.

Own it.

Bieber is freaking amazing.

***

 

I was recently appalled by the notion that someone would be embarrassed to know the lyrics to Bieber’s music.

Appalled.

XOXO, Beck

 

Coffee talk.

What y’all up to?

Me…I’m just chilling’ with Duke, my sweet, spunky, crooked-eared maltipoo – Drinkin’ coffee…watching the rain fall through the kitchen windows. Birds are chirping. It’s nice. I just wonder how they aren’t gargling instead of chirping. Must be right under their birdhouse’s roofline…

My second cup of coffee is getting cold – But I think you can actually taste the coffee when it’s cold…so I’m good with it. My kids are still asleep – AT 7am! – That’s a big deal for me…I may have Children’s NyQuil Cold & Cough to thank for that. On an off note – How do my armpits already reek? It’s so weird – I’m not typing fast enough to generate wind beneath my wings to smell it…*Sniiiiff*…Yup. That smell that keeps you coming back for more. Like – It’s so awesome that I can smell like the prospective Jamaican window cleaner from 2126 Benton Road.

So. Awesome.

Gonna take all three kiddos to the doctor in an hour. I’m thinking about writing down each kid’s symptoms so I don’t get them all mixed up…But that wouldn’t be very much like me – So, never-mind. They’re little liars, though, when it comes to the doctor’s office…it’s like they give themselves a pass in that semi-sterile room. If an untruth can get them out of an injection – It’s worth it. I’m all,

Tell the truth, Baylor. You may not even need a shot…”

Evidently, I’m okay with lying at the doctor’s office as well.

Uh oh…Duke is chewing on a basket. Dude – He chews on CONCRETE. He will literally be sh*tting bricks. I did notice some sparkly stars in his poop the other day. I think the folks that do the averages on dog breed lifespans are gonna have to make some adjustments…maybe not – But probably.

I don’t know what I’m talking about. I’ve only had about 2 cups of coffee.

Well – It’s been nice chatting with you folks this fine rainy AM…I think it’s time for me to try out my new Chocolate Lucky Charms. Gonna be a big day:)

XOXO, Beck

Few & Far Between.

It’s a feeling I get…I just gotta share my deepest, darkest secrets. I’m talking to someone close to me, half-listening to them, and I just have to disclose the secret that I’ve been harboring. If I don’t tell them – It will literally eat me alive…at least that’s the way I used to feel. What has changed? I guess I’m growing up.

About time, huh…seeing as how I’m officially in my mid-thirties, come two weeks from now:) Happy birthday to me! I’m so glad I was born. Seriously, I am. 🙂 When I was a kid, my mom would sit on the couch, after I’d been put to bed, and wait…She knew her little black-haired, guilt-ridden middle child would soon be making her confessional trek. Momma Joy was my priest for many a year.  I suppose that she still is, when need be.

I’ve learned that more times than not, the need I have to share my inner-mosts, is a selfish one. And that feeling I get…that rush of adrenaline – It’s not always the nudging of the Holy Spirit telling me to just, “Get it off your chest, Beck…” No. It’s me wanting to give the burden of my short-comings over to someone else to bare.

I feel sorry for the people that I have had to learn my lessons on…not my mom, though;) True story – I once got UP from my choir seat, after the preacher had said, “If there’s anyone that you need to forgive this morning, do it! Don’t wait…” I got up out my seat – In front of the entire church, mind you – And made my way up to the balcony to tell the girl, that had NO idea that I had issue with her, “I forgive you.” She looked at me like I was nuts. I mean, I think I was.

Geez.

Did I need to do that just because the preacher nudged me to? NO!!! Just because someone – Even someone you respect – says something that could POSSIBLY have something to do with your situation – It doesn’t mean that you have to act on their persuasion. It certainly doesn’t mean that you have to do exactly what they suggest. Oh my goodness, it has taken me a really long time to be objective with other’s suggestions. 

Listen, really listen, to your people when they talk to you…when they tell you about their fears…their feelings. It doesn’t have to be about you. Don’t take every single thing your people say and try to apply it to your own situation – Just listen and focus your energy on them. I’m learning to stifle my need to give my burdens over to others. Don’t get me wrong, I have people that know all of my truths…But they are few and far between.

I just had to share, y’all… XOXO, Beck